Jan 17, 2005

28 Degrees Later

The Weather Elves have suddenly gone terribly, insanely wrong.

Yesterday it was a beautiful 54 degrees or so, just warm enough to wear a t-shirt and jeans and still have just the tiniest bit of a delicious chill. Just cool enough to put a spring in your step. That evening it got cold, but I was still wearing that T-shirt, so it was to be expected. I fall asleep with visions of Frank Black fighting evil in my head, have a few peculiar nightmares that I don't care to relate, and wake up to find that the floor is colder than it has been all winter. Check the WeatherBug, it says "28 degrees." I rub my eyes, thinking I've mis-read, and check it again. "28 degrees." Poked my head out the back door, looked out across the back yard and the field, caught sight of a few cows frozen to the earth and saw the unmistakeable "huddling together to keep from freezing to death" look of some early-rising blue jays, so I took a deep breath and heard the distinctive crackle of my nose hairs freezing, so I know it's 28 degrees all right.

I did it to myself, I guess. Spent a few hours out and about yesterday with the family at the local Cat Fancier's Show, which was surprisingly fun this year, and got the grocery shopping done with my wife, then came home to go back out with my surrogate daughter and cameras galore to take wedding pictures of her in her 45 pound dress. I swear, having helped her around with that thing, I firmly believe that the dress weighs more than she does. I'm going to have to build some kind of rolling armature that she can wear under it so she can have something to fall back into when her poor legs give out from trying to pack that white, pearl-crusted bastard around.

Anyway, the clincher was that I put away my big Swiss Army greatcoat, the wool monster that with the liner buttoned in could block anything short of a .45 round. I looked around yesterday, declared Winter over to myself, and put away my winter coat AND my scarf. That must have been it, the scarf. The coat requires that I wear a minimal of clothing under it, because I tend to sweat profusely or catch on fire if I wear anything heavy with it. My sport coats, on the other hand, are light, and a scarf tossed around my neck not only gives needed wind protection but looks darn dashing, if you ask me, which you didn't, and putting the scarf away was a sure sign that it was soon to be in the low 100's again any day now.

Pfui.

2 comments:

chadsta said...

You gotta love this Louisiana weather.

Irrelephant said...

Do I HAVE to? *lol* I've lived here for something like 34 years now, and still can't get used to it.