Feb 21, 2005

In the interest

of offending a lot of people at one go (one more reason I blog) and to celebrate my syster's birthday by annoying her with blonde jokes, which I almost guarantee will result in painful retailation when I least expect it, I give you:

Some blonde jokes.

Q: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK".

Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde coyote?
A: Got stuck in a trap, chewed off three legs and was still stuck.

Q: Why did the blonde freeze to death in her car?
A: She went to the drive-in theater to see "Closed For The Winter."


renegade said...

You actually got me with those, I'd only heard one before, I'll add them to my collection. It always helps to beat someone to the punch with blonde jokes, otherwise you may end up beating someone with a punch.

Irrelephant said...

Those were the only four that I could find that were not utterly and horribly filthy.

So, my question becomes this--*blink blink* How hard is it, exactly, *blink* to beat someone with a small, shrill handpuppet?



renegade said...

Wanna find out?

Irrelephant said...

Uhm...no. No, I'm pretty sure I don't. The newspapers would get ahold of it and it would turn into some kind of UFO death cult Punch-And-Judy thing, and then they'd do interviews with Mr. Roger's puppets--the King and that crazy old thing that looked a lot like like Mr. Punch, and they'd have H. R. Puffenstuff as a commentator, and then there'd be a massive grassroots movement against puppeteers all over the world, and huge surging crowds of angry street performers trying to destroy art houses, and Muppets setting off explosives outside Disneyland, and I'd be to blame.

Nopey no.