Feb 9, 2005

Tree rat noir

So yesterday I get home from another mind-numbing day at work, and driving into the garage I glance into the back yard to see something I haven't seen out here in a very long time--a black squirrel.

It's not like they're a limited production model or anything, they're not that uncommon, just not out here. We've had squirrels out here ever since there have been trees, and let me tell you that there's been trees out here for the better part of 200 years, so the squirrels likely have more claim on this property than I do. It's just that usually out here we have cat squirrels, the little reddish grey ones, medium size, like to bark at birds, those squirrels. Regular kind. So suddenly out of the blue comes this black behemoth, a good size or so larger than the regular run-of-the-tree rodent, and black as homemade sin. Okay, so he wasn't, there seemed to be a patch of red barely visible to me, at least, on his back right flank, and he wasn't THAT much larger than the other squirrel he was pestering, but it makes for good storytelling if he was gigantic and jet black, inky black, noir in all ways shapes and forms.

It's also good storytelling if he could turn into a cloud of fog, or could speak in riddles that would fortell the fall of empires and the rise of kings, but it was raining, had been raining all day actually so the back yard was full of treacherous mud and big water puddles, and I didn't want to go trekking out there just to find out that I was due to murder my brother, lead the kingdom to victory and then be killed by an asp biting me on the soft bits, so I went inside and had a nice cup of hot tea instead.


renegade said...

But you are due to murder him aren't you? I thought I saw that on the notice board.


Irrelephant said...

Yeah, there was that memo, wasn't there. Ah well, so much for Nostradumus the Squirrel's job.