Mar 14, 2006

How To Land A Job: Part XVII - Personal Grooming

So far we've decided what kind of job we want, what sort of job we're trained for, and how to keep annoying things like flowers, banners and hearts from our resume. Today, we'll discuss personal grooming.

If you'll recall, two previous points need to be revisited first:

1) Do not apply for a job when you don't have the slightest idea what they're hiring for, or if they're hiring at all.
2) Do not apply for a job with your Baby Daddy sitting in the car with your two kids blasting the ghetto bass loud enough that the HR person's water glass vibrates.

When applying in a professional office:
Do not apply if your hair matches your nails and your scrubs. Especially if they're all hot pink.
Do not apply if your pink hair has more spikes than an angry porcupine.
Do not apply if you stink of Kool Menthols.
Do not apply if you appear to be under the age of 12.
Do not apply if your parents are still dressing you. Badly.

Please, please don't even apply if you don't know what you're applying for, and don't apply if you plan on putting "Full Time" for employment opportunity and then write "Mornings only" on your availability.

1 comment:

Vulgar Wizard said...

*whew* Ol' girl was scarey!!!!