For as long as I've known myself I've known that I have a volatile emotional base. Never have I enjoyed a calm, level playing field emotionally; it's always been all or nothing, wild swings from high to low and back again, and an uncanny ability to dwell deep in the doldrums for far longer than could ever be good for me.
As I've grown I've tried most any means available to curb these intense swerves, but have never found the right combination. I came pretty close with sharp blows to the head every hour on the hour but it deprived me of sleep so badly that I couldn't maintain the regime.
If you've been reading for the past week or so, you'll notice that I've been, if not down then at least a lot lower than usual. I can't find the reason for it, but today it seems to have broken, at least temporarily. I feel good inside, moderately rested, and ready for an overcast day full of the potential for rain. And something occurred this morning that really capped my morning: I was on the radio with Ron & Riley again.
I don't usually listen, you see. No offense guys, but pop isn't my taste. I listen to their show on Friday mornings when they play 80's music, but that's it. So it was completely by accident that I was in Detroit Rock City's office this morning when I heard Ron talking about stumping them on trivia questions. I didn't realise that it was a contest, thought it was just the subject of the moment, but me having a mind built for trivial things I thought up something off the cuff and emailed it in.
That's when I heard it was an ongoing sort of contest thing, and the next time Ron asked for calls I rang them up, asked the question while they were off the air, we had a really fun chat, and then we went on the air together, me on the phone and them of course in the studio and I asked the question again, managed to stump them both, even after Riley got the mercury question right, and won tickets to RiverFest, which was, for me, not the high point--the high point was being on the radio with them, interacting, making jokes, that sort of thing. It was almost like Talkies Tuesday, only live, and if I had farted then all of the greater metroplex out here would have heard it.
So now my mood is trying to creep up to that dangerously manic point, and I'm trying to let it out slowly and in a very controlled fashion instead of letting it blow out in one huge manic run, rather like a hunter trying to make his shotgun shell fire slowly rather than all in one go.
Fortunately for me I'm having more success.