Aug 23, 2006

Wouldn't It Be Nice?

Wouldn't it be nice. What a lovely four and a half words. How very useful.

Wouldn't it be nice if, when terrorists abducted foreign reporters in strange lands, they would lead them blindfolded to a secure location then make sure they're comfortable, feed them some nice local dishes, finish it with a good strong coffee and a smoke, and then perhaps take them on a tour of the neighborhood before driving them back to where they were kidnapped?

Life would be so different.

Unfortunately, things like this happen to me: I get a compliment from a patient, through one of our LPNs. She tells the LPN that my "voice is the sexiest thing she's ever heard."

The lady speaking to our LPN is about 90 years old. I don't know if I should be proud or nauseated.


Nancy Dancehall said...

Awwww...that's sweet, actually.

I hope when I'm 90 I've got the mental capacity to say something like that.

O said...

Did you ever see Harold & Maude? The part where Harold is sitting across from the priest, about to marry an 80 year old woman, and the priest says something to the effect of: "the idea of your young body c-c-comingling with her withered flesh, sagging breasts and flabby b-b-b-uttocks, MAKES. ME. WANT to vomit." But take it as a compliment. I'm sure that's the spirit it was meant in.

Irrelephant said...

Wow, O...thanks for, yeah. Mmhmmmm...thanks.

*rushing off to fling myself into a pot of boiling water*

The Ivory Pen said...

Once you clean up your burns, count yourself flattered. She probably is able to relive some of her wilder youth, thinking about your voice as she does so.

Liz said...

I agree - a a matter how old and crusty.

Irrelephant said...

Well now! From this sudden outpouring of positive response, I guess I shall continue to call this nice old woman "dear" when she calls.


Yes I think that you will call that sweet lady, dear, in the near future. The fact that your voice (when your in the right mood) would be the perfect one for a recording to sell anything to anybody. The men would fell that they would be honored the buy your product. The woman would sorta quiver & buy the product after hearing you explane the product again & again.