May 2, 2007

Cheetah Balls: Supa' Fly Doping Challenge Post

In response to my own challenge over at Cheetah Balls, here's a few sound bites promoting the use of cheetah balls as a performance enhancing drug.

"Hey Johnthomas, I've never seen a sixty year-old man run so fast! What's your secret?"
"Why Basquiat, it's Cheetah Balls(tm!) I just let two disolve under my tongue an hour before I'm going to be active, and chew up three or four just before I go onto the field for that extra little bit of testosterone!"
"But aren't Cheetah Balls illegal?"
"Why heavens no, you young zipperfisher, they're an all natural, homeopathic cure and they even smell a little funny, to throw off the drug-sniffing dogs at Customs!"

"Why honey, what IS that alluring scent?"
"It's Cheetah Balls Bodyspray And Performance Enhancer(tm)). Like it?"
"Boy do I? You smell like a mangy filthy piebald savannah cat! Come here, stinky, and give me some of that veldt lovin'!"
(Fifteen seconds elapse)
"Wow, that"
"Thanks, Cheetah Balls!"

"Esteban, is that a Thompson's Gazelle in the garage with it's throat torn out?"
"Yes it is!"
"I told you to stop taking those damned Cheetah Balls(tm)!"
"But hon, I love chasing down prey, and Cheetah Balls(tm) give me the get up and go not only to be a useless stoolie in the office but also a virile killing machine on the Ivory Coast!"
"I want a divorce."
"Hah ha ha ha! Run, bitch."

So kith and kin, feel free to follow the linky thing up there. Stucco, Scott and Vulgar Wizard need your love and support and need to be reminded (quite often actually) that they too are normal and productive members of our online society! Oh, and you can give us YOUR best Cheetah Ball while you're there. It's a win-win!


Vulgar Wizard said...

No, Cheetah Balls told me I wasn't normal, so you're wrong, sir.

meno said...

I used to take Cheetah Balls, but i stopped when i had to start shaving my chest.

Irrelephant said...

*LMAO* Oh, very nice Meno! *applause* Welcome, as it were, to the club!

Nancy Dancehall said...

dammit, I swear I left a comment over there on the CB site, and bugger if it isn't gone!