Feb 24, 2008

The Show That Nearly Got My Account Suspended

Yah, that was it. Give a listen if you dare, it's the show that earned me a call from the Overlords at BlogTalkRadio to make sure I wasn't too naughty.

See, according to the Terms of Use I can't say anything derogatory, inflammatory, racially insensitive or about dwarfs. Which the way I see it pretty much means I can STFU and that's about it. It seems that the masters down there at BTR saw some naughty words in the tag box or noted the "All Sex Episode" title and stepped in to make sure I'm not masturbating while broadcasting or doing other naughty things to farm animals while talking about politics.

Frankly, it stunned me. In my limited listening experience on BTR's comedy and mature shows I've heard some filth (on one of their FEATURED shows no less) that would make a Las Vegas hooker blush. I guess it's different when you're featured. *shrug*

I definitely want to give big thanks to the three ladies who have given me three new featurettes on the show: Maggie Moss,* who is soon to be named The Irrelephant Show Poet Emeritus, Nancy Dancehall our resident Alanis Morrisette expert and Giver Of The Word, and of course dear Schmoopie, (may your cone always bring you joy) who graced us with The Cone Report to wrap the show up with. With a few simple words she showed us that if only we all owned a Cone the world would be a better, more forgiving and certainly more sexually fulfilled place.

So anyway, it's in the bag, next week's show is on hiatus since I'll be in Tex-ass for the weekend and I'm not going to foist off my broadcasting duties on my able but very tired co-host Vulgar Wizard, so bear with me while we have a quiet weekend, all spent gearing up for The Religious Intolerance Episode the next weekend! All major religions will be bashed. In good spirits, naturally. Wouldn't want to get banned for intolerance.

Now. You know you want it, you've waited all week for it, so without any more teasing it's:

The Irrelephant Show All Sex Episode Naughty Catchprhase List!

  • naughty poetry
  • All Christian Home Health
  • What about rock hard boners?
  • Adam Greenfield is naked.
  • fish fucker
  • tyubes
  • Thor demands it.
  • ball lightening
  • I know somebody who just bought a Fiat.
  • Call the White House switchboard.
  • Tapioca Talkers Radio Network
  • touch my cleemon
  • My word of the day is "down."
  • weeping nards
  • Isn't it bionic?
  • It's spelled dCoUwNnT.
  • I guess I can't do a cone update, huh?
  • I'm going to say "down" every episode.
  • poo fighters too
  • Wardrobes
  • There once was a woman from Malone . . .
  • schmoop deck
  • Benjamin Franklin wasn't a president.
  • The Green Cone - solar power panel included - can only use it on the roof - battery backup for cloudy days - windmill attachment
  • scayle
  • I have a passion for anachronisms.
  • http://www.steamream.com
  • It's okay to swallow, you can't get pregnant.
  • It's a SACKreMENt.
  • snake handling
  • backasswards
  • Train bridges are nice places to "have relations."
  • copulatory endeavors
  • upside-down backwards and in the wrong place
  • bridge boneration
  • hang VW out to dry
  • All cones are welcome.
  • threw the hot dog down the hallway

Be sure and give a listen, won't you, for those great hits and many, many more, all from K-Relephant Records! Just one easy click away! Be sure and stop by to leave some feedback, rate the show and if you really want to, give us a swift kick in the harbles.
* Maggie has just posted the poem and limerick that she composed just for the show at her site, so be certain to go check her out!


Merelyme said...

that is a mighty big...um...horn you have there. just stopping by to say hello. i have never heard a blog talk radio show before. how did you get into this?

Gordo said...

A hoot as always, Irr! The phone call's about liability and due diligence, I'm sure.

The lawyers will get us all in the end. For Christ's sake, they have me, the computer guy at a University, wearing safety boots! AUGH!

Stucco said...

I thought it was "Whoredrobe"?

Excellent show as always Irr, damn the terms of service Nazi's.

Schmoopie said...

I had a blast, as usual, Irr! Sorry I was late. I've been feeling under the weather so it was difficult to drag my ass out of bed!

We'll miss you next week. I hope you tolerate TX alright! Be safe :)

Nancy Dancehall said...

It's whoremoans.

That was down-right fun!

Maggie said...

It was a blast. If I'd had socks on, they would have blown off.

Gordo said...

Down, down, doobie, down-down ...

Mona Buonanotte said...

missed it...dammitdammitdammit....

Clowncar said...

Awesome show! I was a day late, a dollar short, as usual.

If you're not pissing off lawyers, you're doing something wrong. Good work.

Irrelephant said...

Hi, Merelyme! Glad you stopped in! The horn-- *lol* That's the only bit of train-stuff that I let slip into this blog, everything else 'train' is on the other. As for how I got into the internet radio thing? Whoooo...that's a whole post to itself, which means I need to get off my bum and write it, right? *s*

Gordo, you have the right of it, I'm afraid. A bus filled with lawyers going off a cliff into the sea with a seat empty is a missed opportunity.

Stucco, I couldn't have done it without you. Well, okay, I could have but it'd not be nearly as filthy. *lol*

Schmoop, Stucco warned us you were feeling under the weather. I sincerly hope you get to feeling better! The Crud has been creeping around down here, some sort of 48 hour bug...gah. Miserable stuff. So how were the chocco-chip pancakes? *big grin*

Is THAT what it is, Nancy? *lol* Could you use that in a sentence please? Glad you came along with us, and you'll be pleased to know I've been slipping "down" into as many sentences as I can here in the office, giggling snidely to myself the whole time.

Barefoot Broadcasting, eh Maggie? The only way to go!

*grooving to the backup Gordo is supplying*

Mona, shall I set a wake-up call for the Religious Intolerance Show? *g* Click the big blue radio link over there and set yourself an email reminder--that's the only way I keep from missing my own show. *lol*

Clowncar, that's the one good thing about it being recorded and archived--looking at the statistics from the site I think I have two to three times as many folks listening to the recorded show as listen to the live one. *shrug* It's the new way! If I don't fit the schedule there's always the replay.

Lawyers. Gah. I've still got a bad taste in my trunk.

Mother of Invention said...

Sounds awesome although I have NO idea what you're talking about! (I barely know how to upload pics!)
Explain sometime how you tune in to the live program and how you even know what time it's on. Guess I should try clicking the sidebar to get the replay, eh? (Yeah, I'm old!)

Irrelephant said...

It's easy, MoI! The easiest way to listen live, if you'd like, is to click on the grey "Call my show live on BlogTalkRadio" button. Any time other than when I'm on the air it'll give you the page where you can set an email reminder and give you all the basic info about the show. More importantly from there you can set up a free listener's account which will do two things: 1) it'll let me see you when you listen and 2) it'll let you enter the chat room and visit with the other listeners who chat (Nancy Dancehall, Maggie, Gordo, Schmoopie and Vulgar Wizard are always there, and others depending on if they remember!)

If you want to listen live, click the same button immediately before or anytime during my broadcast time (noon until 1pm Central Standard time) and it'll bring you to a different page that will let you log into the chat room and the show will stream live over your speakers.


If you need any help you can always email me at irrelephant.blog at gmail dot com and I'll be happy to help however else I can!

mickeldeon said...