Nov 18, 2007

"Write an obituary for an object rather than a person."

I got this little prompt in an email from VW, and it's been waiting patiently in my email's inbox for two weeks now--I simply couldn't delete it. It's such an interesting little meme that I knew the moment I received it that I was going to write it; I was simply waiting for the idea to finish coagulating in my mental attic before posting it.

(I'd love to see lots of you tackle this same little blip, but won't be tagging anyone as I'm anti-tagging. If you do, please let me know?)



The Daily Global Post Intelligencer
"All The News That's Worth Making Up"

TODAY'S OBITUARIES



Pen, Fountain (953 - 11/18/2013)

Earlier today a 2003 Parker Phileas in blue marble resin died at it's home in the Springfield Museum of Antiquities And Farm Equipment Throughout The Ages. Parker Phileas (blue) was widely regarded as the world's last surviving fountain pen. An early-morning fire that ravaged the building where it was housed was believed to have been caused by an electrical fault. Phileas was the last existing representative of a writing instrument designed to be refilled and reused rather than thrown away when empty.

While the fountain pen in general and Parker Phileas specifically had many strong supporters throughout the past decades the ongoing popular opinion of the early 20th century that all things need to be easily disposable helped hasten the demise of many 'reusable' items such as shaving brushes, physical money and moustache cups. Parker Phileas was widely regarded as one of the last extant reusable item in existence until the unfortunate fire at the Springfield Museum destroyed it, a mint condition 1938 International Harvester "Bale-Rite" pull-behind hay baler and two outstanding examples of late 1970's 'banana style' home telephones. Though the fountain pen had declined of late in popularity many school-age children on field trips and a few elderly folk regarded him and his spouse "Writing Paper," who also perished in the fire, quite fondly.

"We're sure gonna miss that old pen" stated one elderly visitor to the former site of the museum. "I remember way back in the day..." This reporter was forced to leave at this point as I cannot stand reminiscing.

Fountain Pen leaves behind many dozens of descendants, including the Bic Stic, the click ballpoint pen and the rollerball, all disposables.



Fountain Pen, seen here in an uncredited photograph circa August 2007 with Bottle Of Ink, both resting on an antique "paper" calendar. Bottle of Ink, a lifelong companion, died just after this photo was taken.

7 comments:

Gordo The Geek said...

A most fitting epitaph to an indispensable tool. I have a Cross foutain pen that I bought myself for my 30th birthday. I actually learned to use one in the sixth grade: our teacher required it and paid for them all out of his own pocket.

Irrelephant said...

How EXCELLENT of your teacher! Do you use your Cross in every-day work, or is it for special events only? I know I love my fountain pens and have carried that blue Phileas for almost six years now. I haven't nor will I ever regret the thirty-something bucks I spent on it.

Gordo The Geek said...

I use it in fits and spurts. I'm feeling a renewed need to carry it again, thanks!

Mr. Turcotte was one of the best school teachers that I ever had. Thanks to him, I read Last of the Mohicans when I was 11, learned some Latin when the rest of the school board didn't offer it and developed a life-long love for ancient Greek and roman history.

Wanderlust Scarlett said...

NOW you tell me you're anti-tagging??!!?!!

sigh.

Okay. I won't tag you for any more memes, but I will tag you with awards from time to time.

I *LOVE* this obit. Very well done... so creative!
Thanks!

Scarlett & Viaggiatore

Irrelephant said...

Gordo, if so then my work here is done!

Scarlett dear, I'm not anti-tagging in the sense that I'm going to find you and burn a tag in your front yard, but anti-tagging in that, truth be told, most memes are either trite, not challenging or are simply lame. I DO, however, appreciate and will gleefully participate in one that is a mind-stretcher, a creativity builder or one that simply seems to be apart from the herd.

As for passing them along? I'd much rather leave mine in the street, as it were, and let someone who happens along pick it up and play if they so choose. *big smile*

And if you ever get the urge to award me, dear, please feel free! It's never a nicer day than when someone goes out of their way to appreciate what I do here. And don't hesitate to tag me if you think it's a challenging, interesting, or otherwise brain-stretchy one.

Nancy Dancehall said...

Cool meme. Why am I not surprised you chose fountain pen? :-)

"This reporter was forced to leave at this point as I cannot stand reminiscing." *snort*

Irrelephant said...

Because I'm as obvious as a large-print book? *lol* I'm starting to get aggravated, tho--the photo isn't working anymore. That's what caused the whole thing, actually. I took the photo at work after I'd filled my pen and realised how low I was in the bottle, saved it as a draft and didn't come back to it for months. Until that little meme came in, actually.